11. Work at Your Relationship
For most of us, there comes a time when we want to settle down with “the one.” For most people, this happens while they are in their 20s. To be in a lifelong relationship is probably one of the greatest moves to make in your 20s, but remember, nothing worthwhile is easy.
Somehow, Hollywood has painted a rosy picture of what it takes to be in a so-called forever relationship. Truth be told, it is hard work and can easily get stale. On the flipside, if you work hard at your relationship with your significant other, you will never be lonely. You will never face a challenge alone and you will always have someone you can share your joy with.
This lifelong relationship is not something you happen to stumble upon. It doesn’t just happen. Some people say there is no such a person as “the one.” There is a wise saying, “There is no perfect person for anyone, but everyone has someone that they can love perfectly.”
People will always disappoint you, especially the ones who are closest to you. You need to remember you will also do the disappointing sometimes. Be open to forgiveness and be willing to stick your pride in your pocket. Remember, you aren’t in your relationship just for yourself.
12. Be Content with Life
There are few people who walk out of high school or college and into a cushy high paying job. When you are in your 20s, you tend to want to live a bit higher than your means. But this is the quickest way to get into debt and sink into a never-ending hole of owing money. Instead, be content with what you have and know you are not in a bad spot. This is another one of the strategic moves to make in your 20s you won’t regret.
As soon as you get to a point where you are fine with whatever you are earning, you will experience financial freedom like few people have. More money doesn’t mean less stress. On the contrary, many people who earn big bucks are often in major financial holes. And because they are so used to the high life, they find it extremely difficult to tone their lifestyles down. They are unstable in their spending and live above what they can afford.
Yes, you should have ambitions to earn more money. Set your target as high as you want them, but when you reach your goals, stay there for a while. As soon as you start feeling that itch to get more, ask yourself whether you are content or whether you are chasing money again.
13. Create Lasting Good Habits
This might seem like a strange tip, but accomplishments are like quick fixes. Sure, you might feel like a million bucks if you achieve something great, but the feeling doesn’t last. Just ask yourself how many times you bought something thinking it would bring you some sort of joy. Before you know it, the feeling is gone, and you feel the same way you did before the purchase.
Accomplishments are like that. People chase after them in the hopes of feeling lasting fulfillment. The truth is, once you achieve something, it is over. You will soon start to look at the next thing you can achieve. The problem with achievement chasers is that they always end up feeling empty afterward.
Creating lasting habits is more important and also sustainable. You will never grow tired of them because the end goal is not to achieve but to maintain. Life is not a sprint from one point to the next. It is often the long-distance runners that get the most out of life.
Creating lasting habits will always give you something to live for and to look forward to. So instead of chasing achievements, chase more sustainable habits and work at perfecting those habits. Sticking to positive habits are one of the most sustainable moves to make in your 20s right up to your 90s.
14. Don’t Burn Bridges
Life has a funny way of making U-turns. It often takes you back to places and situations where you thought you would never return. However, never is a long time and you don’t know what lies in your future. You might have the best-laid plans and a clear destination, but you have little control over what happens from the outside.
Burning bridges because you feel that you may never return is risky. Whatever your reason is for leaving a place, you may want to leave with the relationships intact. Going out all guns blazing will often come back to haunt you. Pride is a terrible thing and if the need arises, you want to return with your head held high.
It is never easy to go back to a place when you don’t want to. But life doesn’t always work out like that. For this reason, it is always a good idea to bow out of a relationship, job or a friendship with grace and humility. At the time, you may feel angry or upset with everyone. But taking the high road is one of the most admirable moves to make in your 20s.
15. Always Seek the Truth
There are few things in life more disappointing than realizing that you have been faithfully holding on to a lie. Regardless of the form or severity of the lie, it’s hard to learn the truth when you aren’t prepared for it. You base so much on the lie, when the rug gets pulled out from underneath your feet, you may feel betrayed. People are fragile creatures and trust is extremely important to everyone.
For this reason, it is important to ask the difficult, uncomfortable questions. At the time, you might not want to know the answer, but the truth will set you free. The truth is almost never an easy pill to swallow, but it beats the sucker punch of discovering it by accident.
When you ask for the truth, you are at least prepared for it to some degree. The blow might still hurt, but you will find you can deal with it much quicker. It like ripping off a band-aid. The initial sting is severe, but it only lasts for a second. There is a weighty burden to carry if you hold on to secrets and lies. So, being honest and always seeking the truth is one of the best moves to make in your 20s.
16. Meet Your Unmet Needs
You may not know it, but your bad habits are a symptom of an unmet need you might not be aware of. The sooner you figure out what that need is, the quicker you can start addressing those needs in a healthy way. If there is a single tip that trumps all the other moves to make in your 20s, then it is this: Bad habits steal from you and keep you back in many areas of your life.
It could be an addiction you are fighting or a time-thieving habit that keeps you procrastinating. In the end, you will go through life with a heavy weight attached to your ankle. There is hope, however. Bad habits are just symptoms of a void you need to fill. You can either choose to fill the void with a fruitless, bad habit or seek out a lasting, healthy alternative.
A bad habit is like junk food. The smell is amazing, and it is tasty, but junk food is poison to your body. The healthy alternative is like a gourmet meal. It smells good, tastes amazing and even the feel of it is exquisite. People all have certain needs and wants. So figuring out how to fulfill those needs in a healthy way will release you from the bonds of your next quick fix.
17. Skip on the Blame Game
Have you ever heard of the Johari window? It says every human has areas known to themselves but unknown to others. They also have areas known to others, but unknown to themselves. Then there are areas that everybody knows and areas that nobody knows. Blaming other people for things is often the result of being blind to one area. However, other people have a clear view of that area in your life.
To put it another way, what you love about other people is often what you love about yourself, and what you hate in others is often something that you can’t see in your own life. There is no easy way to slice this pie. It is hard to do some introspection and see where you are at fault. It is also tough to realize you might be the one to blame for something.
But often the thing you want to blame other people for is a part of yourself that you don’t want to acknowledge. However, if you can accept you aren’t perfect, you will be able to become the person you want to be. One of the top moves to make in your 20s starts by looking in the mirror.
18. Seek Your Purpose
Everyone seeks to fulfill some type of purpose. All of us have a burning desire to do something and to feel important in some way. But if you think your purpose is to have fun all the time, you have a rude awakening coming. One of the most satisfying moves to make in your 20s is to find your purpose.
Pleasure is not the thing that is going to pull you out of an unbearable or uncomfortable situation. It might make it a bit bearable for a while and take the edge off, but it is ultimately just a cushion for the fall. The purpose is the driving force that compels you to go forward in spite of pain or suffering.
This might sound a bit heavy, but to sugar coat it won’t help you either. Maybe you have already had your fair share of fruitless pleasures and found they don’t keep you satisfied for long. The purpose is what makes discomfort worth it. Seeking purpose rather than comfort gives you something to live for other than yourself.
Don’t confuse purpose with selfish ambition. As soon as you discover a purpose for your existence, you will find it aims outward and seeks to help others. If comfort is your first virtue, you will go at it alone and never know why you always dissatisfied with life.
19. Home is Where You Make It
Apart from trying to find purpose in life, most people yearn for a place to belong. Purpose and belonging go hand in hand and one will always complement the other. In your 20s, you may feel the urge to explore, see places and experience things. And that is a wonderful urge to have.
However, exploring should not be the only thing you chase after. If you have opportunities to explore, use them, but make sure you have a place you can call home. No matter how long you spend in another country, or how great a place may be, it will never take the place of home.
One of the smartest moves to make in your 20s is to decide where home is and build on it. It doesn’t necessarily have to be your home country. The only thing that is important is that you find a place and make it home. What and where that looks like is up to you, but one thing is certain, there is no place like home.
There is nothing that can compare to the support and the love that you feel when you are home. No one understands and accepts you as the people back home. They are the ones who will carry and care for you when things look tough. Home isn’t necessarily a house you own, but it always has people who care for you.
20. Learn to Live in the Now
Too many people live in the fear of tomorrow and are debilitated by the things that are not even there. They tend to spend all their lives in preparation for the “what ifs” that may not ever arrive. Some people waste money and energy on an unknown future, so they tend to neglect the here and now. So, the final tip from this list of moves to make in your 20’s is learning how to be happy where you are at right now.
Learn to accept and live in the now and take every day as it comes. Don’t worry about tomorrow because you can’t predict the future. Instead, spend your energy on dealing with the present. There is nothing you can do to assure a certain outcome. Life happens and can wreck your plans in an instant.
Rather, practice being happy and content in the space where you are now. There is no relationship, job, amount of money or level of success that will make you happy if you don’t decide it is good for today. You cannot store up your happiness to use at the time of your choosing. So use it where it is, otherwise, you will never experience true happiness.
You have no guarantees of a tomorrow, never mind a healthy one. That doesn’t mean you can throw caution to the wind and not plan for the next day. It merely means you shouldn’t spend your present days in worry of the distant future.
These 20 moves to make in your 20s will help you pave a bright future for yourself. You may not own a crystal ball, but being mindful when you are starting out will take you far. So, pick one of these and apply it to your life each day.