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Online Comebacks That Are Too Savage To Put Into Words

Darren December 30, 2023

The Internet is a crazy place with a lot of toxic people spouting off nonsense much of the time. One problem is that everybody thinks that they have a platform to give their opinions. This means there is a lot of garbage on social media as well as ridiculous arguments. However, sometimes they produce online comebacks that are too savage to put into words.

Today we’ll look at some of the best online comebacks ever as people roasted idiots online. These comments and reactions are hilarious because they destroyed the original post or tweet’s author. Read on to check out these brutal online comebacks here.

Cute Dress

Sometimes people say idiotic things because they think they’re being intelligent or profound. This woman wrote on Reddit, “Male privilege is wearing the same outfit multiple times to events while girls can’t wear the same dress twice, no matter how cute it is.” Needless to say, this led to one of the most brutal online comebacks ever.

One man replied: “There isn’t a single straight man on earth that cares if you wear the same cute dress twice. The negative comments will come from other women.” This is very true because women place a lot of pressure on each other while men don’t notice what they’re wearing at all.

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Use Your Words

This person appears to have a vendetta against attractive people and roasted them online. There’s no pretending that their words aren’t extremely petty but that’s also why they’re funny. First, the Reddit user said that he feels bad for attractive people who have to communicate with their words for the first time.

Then somebody responded and said that they feel attacked by the comment. But this resulted in one of the internet’s most savage online comebacks. He simply wrote: “You shouldn’t” and destroyed every aspect of the other person’s appearance in two words. It was a ruthless comeback from this sad excuse of a human being.

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Mask Struggles

Many governments introduced mask mandates during the global health crisis because they wanted to reduce the spread of disease. However, some people resented these rules and reacted negatively online as well as in public. The person below said that they struggled to breathe every time they put a mask on.

Then another Twitter user produced one of the best online comebacks ever. They wrote: “The surgeon who wore a mask for six hours to reconstruct my knee thinks maybe you’re lying and also a drama queen.” We hope somebody gave them some water because that is a massive burn.

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No Chill

It’s always hilarious when a major company produces savage online comebacks after somebody roasts them online. This moron decided to slate Netflix over their movie selection on Twitter. However, they didn’t expect the official Netflix US account to call them out and roast them.

But that’s exactly what happened after he claimed that a girl left because she was bored. The Netflix account’s reaction was golden: “Maybe because you were actually trying to watch a movie, Bryan.” Netflix had no chill in this situation but then again, neither did Bryan, who endured a very embarrassing exchange.

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This Didn’t Age Well

Elon Musk bought Twitter in 2022 and decided to fix something that wasn’t broken. The Tesla mogul created havoc when he charged people for verification and introduced censorship for parody accounts. This came after he spent years demanding that Twitter ‘legalize comedy.’ He said that comedy is now legal on Twitter after he bought it.

However, as one person observed: “this didn’t age well” after Musk did a U-turn. So many people produced savage online comebacks and impersonated him on Twitter that he shut them down. It felt like Musk was taking his ball home because everybody was better at playing with it than him.

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Savage Country

There are many horrible people online who refuse to look at every facet of an argument. They have a bigoted opinion and it’s very difficult to change their minds even by holding evidence in front of their faces. This person targeted illegal Honduran migrants and asked why people think the U.S. is such a bad place if they want to travel there.

Then the official WikiLeaks account responded with one of the most brutal online comebacks ever. They wrote: “Because in 2009 the U.S. government supported and legitimized a military coup in Honduras that led to extreme poverty, violence, and repression.” In short, the U.S. helped to create the anarchy present in the Central American nation today.

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Tell Karen

Here’s another incident where somebody stupidly questioned the validity and usefulness of masks. They questioned why nobody wears a mask to protect against sexually transmitted infections like herpes or hepatitis. But they didn’t realize that this would provoke one of the greatest internet comebacks ever.

A fellow Redditor wrote: “Well Karen, they’re called condoms. ‘Dick masks,’ if that helps.”We feel a serious level of mortification for the original author because this was a brutal reaction. Sometimes people don’t think before they write something online but it creates hilarious exchanges.

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Actual Intelligence

Many people use big words on the Internet because they want others to think that they know what they’re talking about. But there is always somebody out there with a little bit more going on between their ears. The first person here asked what’s the evolutionary reason why women don’t find intelligence attractive.

Then another person roasted them with one of the most stinging online comebacks ever. They claimed that women are attracted to how to succeed in life, not a memory of one’s knowledge of how Germany could’ve won World War II. This was a phenomenal roast that brought joy to a lot of social media users.

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Too Wise

There are also plenty of religious preachers on the internet who want to spread the word of God. This makes sense because they can connect with millions of people across the world but they’ll also encounter unbelievers. Here’s a classic example of when their moralizing goes wrong (via Reddit).

The preacher wrote: “The God that you serve is too wise to make a mistake and too loving to be unkind.” Then another person produced one of the most hilarious online comebacks ever. They wrote: “Our source of light gives us cancer, dude” as they tore the argument to shreds in moments.

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Dad Bods

Channing Tatum set heart pulses racing after he starred in the stripper movie, Magic Mike. This prompted one Twitter user to call out overweight men as he said that women preferred six-packs. He wrote: “Magic Mike grossed 167 million. If you still think girls like dad bods, keep dreaming pal.”

However, he didn’t expect somebody else to write one of the funniest online comebacks ever. They replied: “Shrek grossed 484 million just so we’re clear.” Nobody ever expected to see a comparison between Magic Mike and Shrek but now we know what women consider to be peak masculinity (via Some E Cards).

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Sober New Year

Some celebrities rub people the wrong way and it’s more than safe to say that Chrissy Teigen is one of them. A gossip website ran a story that said she enjoyed her sober New Year’s Eve. This came after she quit drinking alcohol for four weeks. However, somebody took issue with this and says that they were five years sober but didn’t advertise it.

Then somebody destroyed this bitter individual in the comments. They wrote: “You just did. In your attempt to discredit her sobriety you literally just advertised yours” (via Ranker). There’s no denying that they ruined the person with one of the most scathing online comebacks we’ve seen.

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I Made You

Parents can be very annoying and often come out with inappropriate jokes that embarrass their children. However, it’s best to ignore these and let them have their fun or they’ll produce further humiliation. One child discovered this the hard way after they told their mother that she isn’t funny.

We can see the mother’s devastating comeback above when the child told her she never makes jokes. She replied savagely: “I made you,” and almost destroyed her offspring’s willingness to live. It’s a great response because she crushed the youngster’s soul and taught them a harsh lesson (via BlazePress).

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2/10

It’s never nice to tell somebody that they’re ugly but that’s exactly what one person did in a message exchange. This was a terrible error because they set themselves up for one of the greatest online comebacks in history. First, they told their recipient that they are ugly. But the other appeared to react positively by saying words can’t describe their beauty.

They successfully lulled the nasty individual into a false sense of security because they were saving the killer line. We can see above that they wrote: “But numbers can,” before following up and rating them just 2/10. This must have crushed their spirit because it was such a harsh line. But they deserved it for being mean in the first place (via BuzzFeed).

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Prove Me Wrong

When somebody invites people to prove them wrong, it’s clear that they believe they’re geniuses. Lauren Witske is a former US Senate candidate with notorious links to Mexican drug cartels. She contentiously tweeted that most third-world migrants can’t assimilate into ‘civil societies.’

Then the author Van Thanh Nguyen shredded her with one of the best online comebacks ever. He told her that he has a Ph.D. in English and won a Pulitzer prize for his novel, The Sympathizer. Then he asked her what she’s achieved. The far-right activist didn’t achieve her ambition of making it into the Senate (via Reddit).

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Hypocrite

Everybody is guilty of being an occasional hypocrite but there are avoidable situations. This high-profile pastor decided to attack same-sex marriage as he made an emphatic statement on Twitter. He enforced his belief that God only recognizes marriages between men and women.

But this prompted somebody to research his personal history and they burnt him in front of his followers. They noticed that he cheated on his wife and didn’t have any remorse about sharing his hypocrisy. Hagee isn’t in a position to lecture anybody about marriage because he’s a massive hypocrite (via Reddit).

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You’re Loved

Nobody likes it with a greedy conglomerate preaches to the masses but this doesn’t stop them from doing it. Burger King’s official Twitter account decided to spread a message of love but it didn’t end well. Firstly, their admin has terrible punctuation but that wasn’t the worst part of their condescending message.

Somebody didn’t have much appreciation for Burger King’s message and replied scathingly. They replied: “You pay people eight dollars an hour,” in one of the best comebacks ever. Burger King’s loving attitude doesn’t extend to the people on their payroll (via Reddit).

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Screenshot

Many of the posts on this list relate to public issues and opinions but this one is very funny. Somebody asked a stupid question about what happens if they press the brake and accelerator at the same time. There are some geniuses on the Internet and the person who responded was one of them.

They said that it takes a screenshot in one of the most hilarious online comebacks we’ve seen. The funniest aspect of this is that the original Tweeter probably didn’t understand what they meant. If they’re dumb enough to ask the original question, the irony will pass over their heads (via Inspire More).

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Checkmate

Gary Kasparov is a Russian chess champion and an activist in his native country. He criticized Elon Musk after the tech billionaire advised Ukraine to cede territory to Russia and stay out of NATO. Then Musk fired back and asked him what he’s done to help Ukraine except to tweet.

A random person replied: “I think Garry knows a little bit about putting himself at risk.” He attached images of Russian police and security services accosting the chess legend and violently arresting him. This is something that Musk will never experience, and he attracted a lot of ire for his disrespect (via Reddit).

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Photoshop

Here’s another example of somebody being ruthless online. A woman decided to leave what she thought was a profound post on Facebook. She said that she needs Google in her brain and anti-virus in her heart. But not everybody wanted to encourage her cringeworthy way of thinking.

A ruthless person responded: “And photoshop on your face,” as he took the computer references to the next level. It’s a fantastic but savage response but she may have found it funny. Some people don’t care about how far they take their comebacks if they find the right opportunity (via Bored Panda).

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Well Played

Several people revealed on Twitter how much they hated a physics book by Roger A. Freedman. That’s because it’s very complicated but they didn’t expect him to join the thread. However, he had some humorous replies and brilliant comebacks as he continued to advocate physics.

One woman said that she used the weighty tome to press her tofu but this didn’t insult the professor. He explained that she used normal force to increase the bulk stress on the tofu and then said “Well played.” Furthermore, he referenced the chapters where he went into detail about these topics in a funny reaction (via Reddit).

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Call Me Colonel

Some men use online forums to engage in their favorite hobby of belittling women. Unfortunately, they think that social media is a great platform for them to spread their bigoted views. One man said that ladies shouldn’t talk about war because they can’t be drafted and told them to sit down.

We can see one of the best comebacks ever above as a powerful woman shut him down. She said that many men treated her this way but now they address her as ‘Colonel.’ He probably didn’t expect a fully-fledged military commander to reply but she destroyed him in front of his peers (via Awesome Inventions).

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Pizza Guy

Here’s one of the funniest exchanges we’ve seen on the Internet for a while. Two people went off on a tangent about how pizza arrives at a house quicker than the police. One of them said that there are consequences if the pizza delivery person doesn’t do their job right.

They implied that they’d shoot the pizza guy if he came too late with their food. It’s a ridiculous interaction but it’s enjoyable to see that the two strangers are enjoying their conversation together. Let’s hope that no pizza delivery people suffered injuries in the making of this (via Reddit).

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It’s Fine

This is one of the most notorious Twitter exchanges ever because of the sheer destruction that occurred. Political personality Meghan McCain went on a rant about the decline of Manhattan. She compared her neighborhood to a war zone and condemned the city’s administration.

But then, actress Kristen Bartlett eviscerated her in one of the best online comebacks ever. “Meghan, we live in the same building, and I just walked outside. It’s fine,” she wrote as she destroyed McCain. This response went viral because McCain’s original post was so over-the-top but this was hilarious.

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Third Wheeling

Some of the best online comebacks leave a sense of poignancy and this is one of them. Somebody said that third-wheeling with a toxic couple ‘is lit.’ They meant that it’s exciting to spend time with a pair that aren’t good for each other. However, somebody had a great reaction to this.

“Not when it’s your parents,” the responder wrote as they instantly made their pain clear. We hope that they’re not going through a tough time because many people live in these types of households. It’s not easy to grow up in a house with toxic parents but at least they had a funny comeback (via Reddit).

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Take A Breath

Sometimes people go crazy on social media and grammar goes out of the window. It feels as though they are writing in a stream of consciousness as they say the first thing that comes into their heads. This person wrote a lengthy post about dangerous drivers but they didn’t use a single period.

This prompted one of the funniest online comebacks we’ve seen. Another person replied: “I’d think someone so concerned with slowing and stopping might want to occasionally use a comma or period.” This was ruthless because the original poster probably had good intentions but the internet is a cruel place (via Reddit).

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Drag Bars

Many people targeted drag bars in 2022 as part of the endless cycle of culture wars. This woman advised people to take their children to church instead of drag bars. Presumably, she doesn’t like make-up or glitter or flamboyant covers of Shania Twain. But somebody reacted in a harsh but effective manner.

They posted statistics about the number of children the Catholic church abused in 50 years. Then they revealed that approximately zero children suffered the same fate at drag shows. It’s safe to say that people should pick their battles and try to make the world a happier place (via Reddit).

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No Slavery

Some people refuse to have fun in this world and find faults in everything. This woman called out ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’ because the movies allegedly erased slavery from the 18th Century Caribbean. Forget the undead pirates and fantastical sea creatures, the most unbelievable part was the lack of slaves.

This prompted another person to reply with one of the funniest comebacks ever. They wrote: “That was actually my biggest gripe about Muppets’ Treasure Island too, the lack of slavery.” It’s so ridiculous but it just shows that there are people who should relax and try to enjoy life a little more (via Reddit).

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It’s A Service

The Economist doesn’t want the U.S. to have a postal service because it produces ‘billions in losses.’ They found it bemusing that over 90% of people view the USPS favorably even though it loses money. It doesn’t matter that it’s essential to the lives of millions of citizens because it’s all about the bottom line.

That’s why somebody tweeted a reply about how it’s a service. They said that it doesn’t lose money but it costs money. Then they compared the USPS to the military and how we perceive things differently. It’s a valid point because the media tries to influence people and affect their perceptions.

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100 Cents

There are plenty of people on the Internet who think they’ve all of the answers. They’ll preach about how to invest money to produce millions of dollars. Needless to say, they haven’t profited themselves but don’t do as they do, do as they say. This individual wrote on Reddit: “How would you turn one dollar into 100?”

Somebody else wrote: “Go Get change, now I’ve 100 cents. This is why it’s important to specify units in the question.” It’s one of the most pedantic replies ever but we appreciate this. Perhaps the original author was trying to be profound or make people think they’re intelligent. Yet they failed miserably (via Reddit).

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Nursing Home

Parents should exercise care when they raise their children because their decisions could come back to haunt them. Here’s a wild situation where a woman explains how she controls her 16-year-old son. She says that she sends him to be at nine and they only receive an hour of supervised internet use per day.

This shocked a lot of people on the internet who just thought that her parenting methods were too extreme. One person replied: “Crazy that those are gonna be the exact rules you follow in the nursing home.” It would be interesting to know if she changed her approach after reading this (via Reddit).

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Aren’t You Sisters?

It’s always funny when somebody tries to be profound on the Internet but fails miserably. Kim Kardashian is a reliable presence on Twitter because she always produces cringeworthy content. Here’s a tweet where she shared pictures with her sister with the caption: “Somehow in this crazy life we found each other.”

Somebody observed that yes, they are indeed sisters and questioned this in a retweet. This meant that they didn’t find each other because grew up together. It’s ludicrous but hilarious and one of the funniest online comebacks on this list. Sometimes people should think before they tweet (via America’s Best Pics).

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Your Feet

There are all kinds of posts on the Internet where people think that they look good. Here’s one where somebody asked their followers to ‘whisper something dirty in my ear.’ They expected them to flirt with her and leave comments about how good she looked. But one troll took this in a different direction.

He observed that her hygiene routine didn’t extend to her feet and commented on this. When she said to whisper something dirty, he replied: “Your feet.” It was a simple response but a brilliant one that made a lot of people laugh. He received more likes than the original post (via Me).

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Rewrite!

One of the most cringeworthy sights on the Internet is when somebody says and believes something that is extremely true. Just ask Senator Marsha Blackburn because she knows all about this. The good senator tweeted an unfortunate message that came back to haunt her about never rewriting the U.S. constitution.

Then the journalist Jemele Hill tore her to shreds as she observed that amendments made it possible for Blackburn to become a senator. They also meant that Hill didn’t grow up as a slave. It’s safe to say that Blackburn’s attempt to appear powerful didn’t work effectively.

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Stone-Cold Kimmel

Jimmy Kimmel is one of the most popular and successful talk show hosts in the U.S. He’s also a famous comedian and very defensive of his guests. Sometimes these two things cross paths when somebody tries to criticize them online. One person threw shade at Dua Lipa after she appeared on his show and said that women aren’t funny.

Kimmel replied to this tweet with one of the most crushing online comebacks ever. He wrote: “Maybe if one talks to you someday you’ll change your mind.” It’s possible that the police came and arrested Kimmel after this tweet because he destroyed the idiotic critic.

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False Narrative

There’s nothing inherently wrong with having more money than other people. But it’s very annoying when somebody pretends that they did something the hard way when the truth is that their parents paid. That’s the situation below where a 19-year-old got the keys to his first house and bragged about it.

Somebody took the time to check the realty records and discovered that the teenager’s father bought it. They also proved that he doesn’t run a company but it’s his father’s business. There’s no need to pretend to do any of these things because it reveals a crazy level of insecurity (via Some E Cards).

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Friends Not Food

It’s always amusing when people are needlessly petty online. PETA represents animal rights with regular campaigns and protests across the world. Sometimes they go too far and antagonize ordinary folks who like animals but also enjoy a juicy hamburger. Here they preached on Twitter: “Cows are friends, not food.”

However, they didn’t expect somebody to reply with one of the funniest online comebacks ever. Their petty response was: “Name one cow you’re friends with.” It was very dumb but it amused a lot of people because of this. Imagine the indignation on the PETA admin’s face.

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Mind My Business

People react to different posts in funny ways. One website tweeted a picture of a wanted felon with tattoos all over his face. They advised citizens to call the police if they spot him because the marshals want him. It’s safe to say that there isn’t a more criminal-looking criminal on the planet.

Then somebody retweeted this post with a very funny caption overhead. They wrote: “If I spot this guy Ima mind my damn business.” That’s because of the man’s terrifying appearance. Perhaps he’s a misunderstood sweetheart but it appears that he’s not a contributing member of society.

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Wake Up

Is anybody more infuriating than the people who preach about their morning routines? They find them to wake up, do a workout, meditate for an hour, read a self-help book, do a week’s meal prep, and do their make-up. Meanwhile, many of us choose between taking a shower or having breakfast because we’re in a rush.

When one person asked their followers which part of their morning routine takes the longest, another had a funny reply. They simply wrote: “deciding to get up.” This is a sentiment that most folks will relate to because it’s never easy to get out of bed. Who needs a morning routine anyway? (via iFunny).

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Wi-Fi Password

One day Lady Gaga decided to smash her keyboard and tweet a bunch of random letters and numbers. We’ve no idea what the eccentric pop star intended to do but she decided that this was a valuable contribution to the world. For some reason, she still managed to achieve hundreds of thousands of likes.

Meanwhile, somebody stole her thunder with one of the funniest online comebacks ever. He wrote: “What’s your wi-fi password? It’s on the back of the router.” This simple but brilliant description of her bizarre tweet brought a lot of joy to people’s days (via Ruin My Week).

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Coats of Sugar

Piers Morgan is one of the most controversial media personalities in the U.K. He sometimes pops up on American TV too but that happens less frequently these days. The presenter polarizes people with his opinions. One day he tweeted: “I hope people don’t make me sound too perfect when I die. No coats of sugar please.”

Then the famous singer, John Legend destroyed him with a brilliant comeback. He wrote: “You could test us by announcing your retirement. He subtly tried to encourage Morgan to remove himself from the public eye because he is an annoying personality. We appreciate Legend’s effort at a comeback, even if it was unsuccessful.

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