15 Values To Teach Children That Will Make Them Better People

2. Making Mistakes is a Part of Life

Many parents and children feel the need to be perfect all the time. They find mistakes embarrassing and avoid them at all costs. A person who is afraid to make a mistake will never leave his or her comfort zone for fear of erring.

Children need to learn from an early age that making mistakes is okay. The key skill children need to acquire is how to respond to making a mistake. Explain to them that no error is worthless if it becomes a learning experience. Show them that, as a parent, you also make mistakes from time to time. Give them some scenarios on how you could respond to a mistake you have made and let them suggest which is best.

For example, if you’re cooking rice and accidentally burn it, use it as an opening to discuss mistakes and react to them. Ask your child what they think you should do next. Should you throw the rice and the pot into the trash, or just throw the rice away and try again? Or should you never try to cook rice ever again?

Once you’ve discussed the scenarios and led your child to choose the correct response, you can open a dialogue with them about mistakes. Ask them if they made a mistake today. Let them tell you about a mistake they may have caused. Ask them how they reacted to making the error.

Depending on their answer, ask what other responses they could have made and how to choose the most correct one. Making mistakes is normal, and so teaching your child how to deal with a mistake is an invaluable skill.

3. Quality Knowledge is More Than a Symbol on a Report Card

Many parents pressure their children to achieve good grades and get upset when their child doesn’t get the grades they hoped they would. Children sense this disappointment and feel like failures who have let you down. Never express anger at a child who hasn’t achieved the grades you were expecting if you know they tried their best. Be realistic in your expectations of your child. A meeting with their teacher should answer this question for you.

Bear in mind that children are different. They don’t all fit neatly into the pigeonholes that school creates for them. They learn in different ways. Children who learn through doing are not going to perform well in written tests and exams. So, don’t focus on the grade that the child obtained.

Instead, focus on whether your child has a working knowledge of the subject matter. Celebrate that instead of the symbols on a report card. Teach your child that the symbols on a report card don’t equate to their value to you as a parent. Encourage your child to try their best in every task at school.

Tell your child what they achieve will make you proud as long as you know they have given it their all. Remind them that other children who make better grades aren’t better or more important than them. Let them learn in the best way they can and be proud, confident learners at school who know the value of hard work.

4. When Things Go Wrong, Home is the Place to Go

Children need to know their parents are not monsters who can only find fault, shout and give endless lectures. They should see their parents as approachable, reliable and trustworthy. One of the feelings of failure for a parent is when something terrible happens to their child, but they confided in a friend’s parent instead of them. Your home needs to be a safe space where your child feels free to share anything and ask questions to get honest, age-appropriate answers.

For example, when children are curious about “the birds and the bees,” they must be able to ask their parents questions instead of relying on friends on the playground, which in many instances are wrong.

Children are curious. Don’t lean on your child’s teacher or Google to answer all their questions. Be there to help your child when they need it. Let them know that no question or problem is too big or too small to share and you will always try to help them. Show them you don’t always know the answers yourself. It’s okay to tell your child you do not know the answer to a question they have.

Just say you’re going to consider the question while you find the solution. A child who knows there is an open, welcoming place with unconditional acceptance will come home when there is a problem instead of seeking help elsewhere.

5. Stand Up for Yourself When Necessary

Children have an innate urge to please adults and peers. But as they grow older, they won’t always agree with everything adults and peers tell them. Children don’t always have to agree with an adult or a peer, but they should still demonstrate respect when expressing their disagreement.

Conflict and disagreement are parts of everyday life. But children must know the correct way to respond. Teach your child if they disagree with what someone says, they can challenge the other person, but that they can’t be aggressive or dismissive of the other person’s opinions or feelings.

When they disagree with someone, your child must be able to explain the basis for their disagreement. So, they can’t say “I disagree,” but then say “I don’t know” when the person asks them why. Disagreement and reasoned debate add value to everyone as it opens their eyes to new perspectives that didn’t occur to them.

Encourage your child to practice debate skills at home. If you give them a chore they don’t want to do, tell them they may disagree with you, but they must explain why. Then explain why the task is necessary and why you feel they should do it. You don’t have to change your mind about the chore.

Just give your child the chance to express their opinion in a safe environment where you can guide them on how to communicate correctly. This is an important life skill your child will need to apply to everyday life, especially as an adult.

6. You are Not on Earth to Seek the Approval of Others

The most significant danger children face is peer pressure. A child who hasn’t been taught to think before doing something is more susceptible to peer pressure. Children need to distinguish between doing something because they want to or to seek the approval of others.

Doing things to gain the approval of others is a dangerous game. It starts with small things and ends with big ones that could have life-changing potential and consequences. Children should know that being popular with their peers must not be their primary goal. Their primary goal should be to do the right thing regardless of what their peers may think.

This can be hard, especially as children get older. That’s why it’s vital to get as much practice as possible when they are younger to prepare children for their adolescent years. Children who learn to evaluate the consequences of their actions and analyze their motives are more likely to make better decisions than those who don’t. A parent must spend a great deal of time with a child to teach this skill. Discuss the types of choices your child may face.

Brainstorm the options your child would have in the face of such a situation. Evaluate each possibility by asking your child if it is what they wanted to or what their friends wanted them to do. Ask them to explain the consequences of each option to you. Give them the tools to make the right decisions. Give them multiple opportunities to practice, so when the time comes, making the right decision will come naturally.

7. Never Be Afraid to Admit You Don’t Understand

Pretending to understand something when you don’t is a fool’s errand. However, admitting you don’t understand can be scary. Children may fear ridicule by classmates if they ask the teacher to explain something to them again. And adults feel the same way in the workplace.

When a child learns early on to ask when they don’t understand, they won’t find it so intimidating. Teach your child that asking questions is smart. Tell them that not everyone understands everything the first time around and it’s okay to ask for a re-explanation. Show them asking clarity-seeking questions saves them the time it takes to figure something out for themselves.

Use tasks and other opportunities to teach your child this skill. Give them deliberately vague instructions. One of two things will happen. They will ask you to explain again in more detail, or they will try to follow the instructions without understanding them. From their response, take your cue.

If your child asked more questions, praise them and ask them why. Tell them they have done the right thing and motivate them. If the child doesn’t ask any questions, it is likely they won’t be able to follow your instructions. But let them try. When they don’t get it right, ask them why they didn’t ask any follow-up questions. Tell them it’s okay to ask for more instructions or explanations. Show them if they had asked, they would have been able to follow your instructions correctly the first time.

8. Listen to Your Body and Approach an Adult When Sick

Even healthy children get sick from time to time. A growing number of children deal with conditions such as epilepsy, diabetes and asthma. A child needs to be aware of their health condition. Also, they should never be afraid to tell an adult, like their teacher if they are feeling unwell. A child who is frightened to say they’re sick is potentially damaging their body to avoid causing inconvenience.

Teach your child to listen to their body. It will tell them if they are sick. Talk to them about feeling feverish, getting headaches or a cough, and an upset stomach. Tell them they shouldn’t ignore these things. They should immediately approach a responsible adult and tell them when they’re not feeling well.

A child with a pre-existing condition should understand their situation and their symptoms. Be sure your child can explain what’s wrong with them. Let them know what they can do in an emergency. If they feel the onset of an episode or attack, your child should alert a responsible adult before it becomes an emergency.

Also, discuss your child’s condition with all the adults responsible for your child’s wellbeing so they can be on the lookout for symptoms. It’s vital a child understands that feeling sick and suffering in silence serves no one. Tell them to approach the adult in charge to inform them. Sitting in class while feeling sick accomplishes nothing. A child can’t learn if they feel sick.

9. Caring for the Environment is Everyone’s Responsibility

From an early age, a child should be aware of their natural environment and how important it is to look after it. Show your child the world around them and discuss it with them. Point out the landscape, plants and animals you encounter in different places such as the store, school and the park.

As your child gets older, teach the ways they can care for the environment. Point out places that are littered and dirty. Ask your child how they think that happened. See if they can tell you how this will affect the plants and animals in the environment. Ask what they can do to make sure the environment stays clean.

It’s not realistic to expect them to clean up the mess, as it is hazardous. But you can discuss throwing waste into a bin instead of on the ground. Remember to lead by example in this regard. Do some gardening with your child even if it’s something as simple as growing an indoor plant together. Teach them to appreciate the importance of plants.

It’s an excellent way for a child to commune with nature and grasp its beauty and significance. Instilling respect for nature and the environment while they are young can inspire children to become active in securing the environment when they are older. Even if they don’t go that far, environmental responsibility will become part of their subconscious. So, your child will pass their knowledge on to others, including their children one day.

10. There are Times When It’s Okay to Say No

Parents spend a good deal of time teaching their children to respect adults, teachers and family members. But that doesn’t mean children need to comply with them in all regards. Children must learn the ability to say no under the right circumstances. A child who has learned to never refuse instruction from an adult is susceptible to sexual abuse.

Unfortunately, sexual predators are prevalent, and since they look like ordinary people, they are difficult to identify. They tend to prey on compliant children because they have a better chance of getting away with abusing them. Early on, have a discussion with your child about places where an adult should not touch them. Teach them to say no to such contact.

Saying no is more difficult than it sounds in normal circumstances, such as when you get unreasonable instructions. Yet it is a vital skill that children need to learn. However, they need to learn to say no with respect and dignity. Teach your child there are times when they may need to refuse instruction from an adult but do that with respect.

Sometimes it can be something as simple as saying no to staying after school when they must be home early. A child should understand, if done correctly, saying no can also earn them the respect of those around them. Children must also learn to say no to themselves, as well. They will encounter many temptations as they grow up, so children need to know how to refuse to give in to them.

11. Have a Love of Reading and Learning

In their early school years, children learn to read. From the age of about nine onwards, they read to learn. It’s vital at this stage to have role models who read regularly and demonstrate a love of reading. Setting this example is invaluable during the early childhood development years.

A child who loves reading will never feel lonely because reading unlocks many new worlds for them to explore. Reading is a constant learning process. It expands the vocabulary and writing abilities of children. It also makes them more eloquent when expressing themselves verbally.

A love of learning develops through a love of reading. Parents should stress the importance of education and taking advantage of any learning opportunities. Show your child how important their education is in shaping their future. Discuss their school day with them and show an active interest in what happened.

When a child sees that their parents take education seriously, they will, too. Be an involved parent and interact with your child’s school to monitor their progress. Knowledge is power, and education is a child’s chance to gain as much knowledge as possible. An education is something no one can take from your child.

12. Manners Cost Nothing

Parents strive to make sure their children learn to say “please” and “thank you,” and have good manners. However, if they want it to become an automatic reaction, parents should explain to their children why it’s essential to have good manners and be polite. Manners show respect, and respect is a two-way street. A child should understand having manners and showing respect to someone will earn that person’s respect.

It’s good when others respected you as it gives you a feeling of purpose and value. Teach your child that manners aren’t for certain situations with certain people. Show them they should behave properly always, regardless of who they’re interacting with. Manners are also a sign of self-discipline. They show that a person can put their respect for others above their desire to achieve a particular goal.

This is evident when a child takes the time to thank a shop assistant for serving them before grabbing their purchase and going. Manners are more than saying “please” and “thank you.” Manners include greeting and assisting others, especially elders, as well as table manners, too.

A child will learn and keep good manners if they see them in action every day in the home. Parents need to lead by example because they are the role models their children base on their behavior. Manners are the building blocks to form good relationships. So when children see their parents using good manners, it shows them how to treat others with respect.

13. Make Healthy Food Choices and Exercise Regularly

With childhood obesity on the rise throughout the world, one of the most important skills to teach a child with is how to to choose healthy foods. The lifestyle today’s children lead is more sedentary than ever, so teaching your child to love exercise and sports will benefit them in the long-term. As parents, you are not with your children all the time, so you can’t always make healthy food choices for them. You need to teach them to do it for themselves.

From an early age, involve your child in the food-making process. Encourage them to experiment with different fruits and vegetables and ensure that they get variety. Let your child be hands-on with cooking. The more involved a child feels, the more likely they are to eat the food and try something new.

As your child gets older, start discussing food groups with them. Ask them to categorize the food you are cooking into the different food groups. Teach them about balanced meals and how to design one. Let them be involved in deciding what to include in meals they help you prepare. Assign small tasks in the meal-making process for your child to do, such as cutting vegetables, setting the table, monitoring the timer or doing the dishes.

When it comes to exercise, get involved where you can go for walks or jogs with your child. Do aerobics or yoga with them at home. When your child sees you taking exercise seriously, they will too. Encourage your child to participate in different sporting disciplines, emphasizing the importance of enjoyment over winning.

14. Take Responsibility Around the House

Many parents have trouble getting their children to do chores around the house. Chores are part of the learning process and important in preparing a child for adulthood. It is important to start giving age-appropriate chores from an early age. There is a great deal of dispute as to what constitutes age-appropriate tasks. It also varies from country to country and from culture to culture.

The type of chores depends on the child, too. The age and abilities can determine the best jobs to do around the house. Some family experts say chores should earn children an allowance. They should do them merely because a parent has assigned them to the child. Monetary benefits should be for extra jobs around the house above the usual chores they need to do.

Teach children from a young age that doing chores doesn’t always result in payment. In fact, they should understand that duties are a responsibility, not a paying task. Before assigning a chore, parents should make sure the child can do the task by themselves.

Some simple chores include caring for pets, sweeping floors and straightening their room. Make chores fun by putting a colorful chore chart on the fridge. If you have more than one child, you can rotate age-appropriate tasks on a weekly basis or the children can do them together.

15. Every Action Has Consequences

Just as in physics where for every action there is a reaction, in life, choices we make have consequences. It is critical that children learn from an early age their efforts have consequences and they will be accountable for any actions they take. Children should learn from a young age that making the right choices will bring positive results while making poor choices will cause problems. This is a valuable life lesson, as it applies in adulthood, as well.

You can mold children into critical thinkers with the foresight to see the consequences of the decisions they make. Punishments and rewards don’t have to be extreme, but they need to be age-appropriate. It also depends on the nature of the child. Parents know what makes their children tick.

There is no point in withdrawing reading privileges from a sports-crazy child who doesn’t enjoy reading, anyway. Similarly, there is no point in rewarding a bookworm with a soccer ball if they don’t enjoy playing the sport. Discuss the rewards and corrections with your child ahead of time, so that they associate these consequences with the decisions they make.

Let your child try role-playing different decision-making scenarios. Give them the opportunity to provide input, so that they feel involved in the process. It’s likely to make them more aware of the consequences if they feel invested in them. Finally, parents must follow through with the rewards and punishments they have promised. This will help teach your child to think first before acting.

These 15 essential things to teach your child by age 10 may sound daunting, but you will have many opportunities to reinforce them. Talk to your child about each, but most of all, teach by example.